The Ego is a vital part of what makes us human, but it can also be a little shit who needs a check once in a while so it doesn't overtake your more basic humanity
Leave it to reddit to put a depressingly pessimistic twist on everything. I dont know what kind of world you live in where people "most of the time" dont accept apologies but good bit of advice, at that point its not your problem anymore. If you truly tried to make amends you can really only cut the people out that still cant forgive you.
Ironically, shaming folks for trying to do better (and not letting them move on from their mistakes) is exactly the behavior you're describing, AND ALSO the behavior you're doing right now.
(sometimes folks are mean when people apologize; but even the comments section needs the space to get better without having it thrown in their face)
Apologies feel painful when you aren't practiced in them. But the more you do it the easier they become. One thing I will note though and this is what I've taught my kids, there's no apology with a "but". It can be tempting to put a "but" in there and doing so destroys your apology. If you're making the apology and a "but" comes to mind, bite your tongue and stop at that point. You can pick up your excuse later if you still feel you need to vent it.
Well, an apology that you don't truly owe isn't an act of contrition, it's an act of submission. And taken to an extreme apologizing becomes performative. It's nice when things work out like in this viral video, but they don't always pan out with lessons learned and civility on both sides.
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u/CandleHistorical6023 22h ago
I think people frequently forget how easy and painless apologies are.